Picket Fences

A poem best read aloud, followed by commentary. Consisting of two stanzas, a ton of commas, and hopefully some original thought.

Picket fences

Pick it, pick it, pick it,

Pick it 'till it bleeds.

Picket, Picket, Picket,

Picket fences divide me.

Sticker, sticker, sticker,

Brambles 'round my knees,

Stick her, stick her, stick her,

Squealing little piggy.

Commentary:

(Disclaimer: I wrote this commentary merely to add some context behind the thought process going on in my mind surrounding the creation of this poem. These ideas are often disjointed, and inelegant. The poem is there for personal interpretation, so my ideas surrounding it are no more valid than yours. This poem is what I meant to say, and doesn't need context to say it, therefore, you are welcome to read the commentary, but is merely that, and not an extension of the poem itself. ) I wrote this poem about self destructive thought patterns I often indulge myself in. Specifically a thought pattern that involved internalizing and punishing myself for my mistakes. Although this is not an enjoyable mental path to travel, I used the word "indulge" conscientiously. This thought pattern is indulgent in the way that it allows us to escape responsibility for the consequences of the actions we made by punishing ourselves. In this way we lie to ourselves and try and substitute the consequences of our actions, with our self inflicted punishment, so that when the real consequences of our actions roll around, we are undeserving of them, because we claim that we've already suffered enough for our infractions. We never fully acknowledge the connection between our mistakes,and the consequences. But that is not how agency of choice works. We don't control the world, or the consequences, merely the our approach to the world, and the choices we make that result in consequences. Self punishment has an element of vanity in it, believing that we can control the consequence of our actions, and how much they really hurt us. But in the end, we are the only ones who suffer. Some ways in which I attempted to demonstrate this concept was in the tense. In the first stanza it is obvious that someone is picking at something, they are actively doing something, punishing a sore wound, an action that won't make it heal. In this first stanza, they are making choices, and executing actions. But in the second stanza, something is being done to them, "stick her, squealing little piggy." a line to instill a feeling of victimization. This second stanza demonstrates how a force is acting on them, not visa versa. This is coming from a mind that is travelling through a thorny path of stickers, and "Brambles 'round my [their] knees" a path of self punishment that leads nowhere. The poem describes no destination, merely a painful journey. A journey that doesn't allow for accountability and improvement, merely a cycle of self pity and loathing.